BACKSTAGE SECRETS

Ellie is sitting in between Micky and Dan, Dan Williams.  Dan is a video technician in his early thirties.  He's married, but of course adores the opposite sex and he has had his eye on Ellie for several years!  Ellie, needless to say is not the slightest bit interested, but always enjoys playing up to him when they work together.  No harm in flirting now is there?  Besides which, Dan is extremely handsome, with a six pack to die for!  We all adore him, especially when he discards his top!

Backstage Secrets by Michelle Shingler & Vincenza Astone

BACKSTAGE SECRETS

"I can't believe you just said that!" says Belinda, tears of laughter srill running down her cheeks.  Belinda is sitting on the other side of Mel. Belinda Edwards, the fun loving production assistant.  She's young, slim, blonde and oh so pretty.  We always call her by her full name and never shorten it to Bel.  A previous boyfriend once referred to her as 'Swell Bel' when she put on a little unexpected weight and from that day to this, she refuses point blank to be called Bel. 

The crew boys simply love Belinda, together with her partner in crime (and I stress here, 'partner in crime' relates to her working relationship, not sexual relationship), Ellie Harman.  Ellie is a real butterfly, extremely beautiful and full of life.  Belinda and Ellie have carved out a real niche for themselves as Production Assistants and they really are the best in the business.  Efficiency beyond, when sober of course!


Backstage Secrets by Michelle Shingler & Vincenza Astone

BACKSTAGE SERETS

The cabin crew have completed their safety demonstration and are now walking through the plane checking passenger seat belts.

"Excuse me Madam, please could I ask that you tighten your seat belt?" asks one of the air stewardesss.

"Honey, not without liposuction I can't.  No!" comes an immdiate reply.  Each and every one of our crew bursts into laughter.  Tears are rolling down our faces, as many passengers turn around to see what all the commotion is about.

The stewardess blushes, but giggles too, not sure that she is being politically corret at laughing at a passenger's misfortune.  I am sitting next to Mel, Mel Arethusa, Show Caller extraordinaire!  Mel is one of the funniest girls on the conference circuit, with a sense of humour second to none, but always a true professional.  She is larger than life, in every sense!  Cuddly of mass proportions, kind and a very attractive girl and of course, crew just love working wth her and her never-ending wit.


Backstage Secrets by Michelle Shingler & Vincenza Astone

BACKSTAGE SECRETS

I cringe just thinking about that trip.  I had to stay at the airport for another four hours until my luggage was redirected from Charles du Gaulle Airport - quite how it ended up in Paris I have absolutely no idea.  Then the battery went flat on my mobile and my purse was in my handbag, which yes of course, was in the hold too! Never again will I be parted from my beloved handbag.  I will fight to the death for it to be with me at all times, irrespective of how much the bloody thing weighs!

Backstage Secrets by Michelle Shingler & Vincenza Astone

Backstage Secrets


"Of course I remember!  That attendant was a complete bitch!  She had it in for me the moment I arrived at check-in. Oh, but then the best of it is, we arrive into Heathrow and every one of you rushes off, once your bags have come through, for which I don't blame you, after all, I would have done exactly the same, but I was left there, like a right idiot, without any bags. Not one!  And where were my car keys? Yep, in with my luggage. Oh, that was a fucking nightmare!"

BACKSTAGE SECRETS





"Hey Martha remember the time we were coming back from that gig in Dubai and you had a bust up at check-in because 'Madam, you have way too much luggage with you' he says, imitating the check-in attendant.  "In the end you literally shoved everythin' into the 'old except your mobile, passport and boarding pass.  Fuck!  You were fuming.  Still makes me laugh, your face was a picture!" 

The voice belongs to Mickey Prowse.  Mickey's a fabulous industry colleague and also a very special friend.  Not special in the sense of jiggy jiggy sex special, but simply special.  So how best to describe him?  Cheeky and an outrageous flirt!  Plain and simple.  He's a sound engineer and one of the conference industry's real characters and now he's sitting directly behind me, which of course unnerves me somewhat!

Backstage Secrets by Michelle Shingler & Vincenza Astone

Backstage Secrets

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain, Charles Mead speaking and I'd like to welcome you aboard this British Airways flight to Nice.  Our flying time today will be approximately one hour and fifty-five minutes.  The weather forecast is looking favourable, with good visibility and beautiful clear skies.  We'll soon be taxied to our runway and it looks as if we shall be taking off slightly ahead of our allotted departure time. The cabin crew will shortly take you through our safety procedures and we would be grateful if you would give your undivided attention, even for those frequent flyers of ours.  In the meantime please sit back, relax and enjoy your flight."

Now, just how many times have I heard a flight captain's announcement?  And yet here I am again, jetting off to foreign parts and getting paid for it!  Perfect, I often wonder if life can really get any better.  Well, yes of course it can!  I fly an average of two or three times per month, sometimes more and sometimes less, but it goes with the job.  This perfect job of mine!

Backstage Secrets, Michelle Shingle and Vincenza Astone